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When love hurts

Instead of uniting us, it's torn my family apart...


Published by: Sarah Lain and Lisa Brookman
Published on: 1st June 2010

Blinking blokes. I’d just packed my good for nothing fella in –  the last in a long line of them. Well, that was it, I was going to stay single from now on!
At least there was one person I could rely on, my mum Sylvia, 50. She’d kindly taken me in after this latest split – well almost.
She’d put me up in the caravan outside her bloke George’s house. Mum was lovely, and had brought me up tough like her. But we were so alike, we bickered like mad. So, to be honest, being out here was probably for the best.
Gazing out of the grimy caravan window at the teeming rain, I shivered and wondered what my kids were up to. Joe, 17, Karen, 15, Ian, 12, and Caitlin, eight, were living with their dad…
Rat-a-tat-tat.
Opening the door, I found a sodden George.
‘Thought you might like a brew,’ he smiled, handing over a mug of tea.
Mum had a cleaning job, and never had time to chat. But George checked on me constantly.
‘Thanks,’ I cheered.
‘How are you?’ he gently asked.
‘Missing the kids,’ I sighed.
‘Chin up, you’ll see them at the weekend,’ he soothed.
Mum had it made with George. Knocking on 55, he was still working as a security guard. He worshipped her and loved his kids from a previous relationship, especially his youngest daughter Gemma, eight.
Whenever Caitlin came to visit, he’d be out in the garden with them or playing tearooms.
On his day off, he even took me to the supermarket.
‘You want to get yourself a flat,’ George said, while inspecting the back of a tin of baked beans.
‘That’d be nice,’ I smiled, sadly.
’How about I help you do the housing forms?’ His kind brown eyes crinkled at the edges as he smiled. Yeah, he might not be a stunner, with his mop of grey hair, but Mum had definitely struck gold.
He was as good as his word, too. Three months later, I was moving into my new place.
Gemma and Caitlin still played together so, while Mum was always busy working, I often saw George.
And we still did the weekly shop together. We could string it out for hours, we chatted that much while pushing our trolleys along.
‘I love a bit of Bob Dylan, play it on the guitar,’ he’d tell me.
‘I’m a big fan of Kylie,’ I smiled. ‘I’d die for a bum like hers.’
‘Australian, isn’t she?’ he asked. ‘I’ve always dreamed of travelling the world…’
‘I’ve always dreamed of being a millionaire!’ I laughed back.
Such a happy-go-lucky guy. I’d often watch him babbling away to the check-out girls, and smile to myself.
He was like a young bloke in an old man’s body. They broke the mould when they made George.
If only I could find someone as kind … and 20 years younger!
So, it came as a massive shock when Mum called me a couple of weeks later to tell me she was leaving him. He’d seemed like everything was fine.
‘Why? You’ve been together years,’ I wailed.
‘We’ve been arguing all the time,’ she sighed. ‘I couldn’t be doing with it any more.’
‘A-are you okay?’ I asked.
‘I’m fine, love – this was a long time coming.’
I rang George. He was devastated.
‘The house is so empty without her,’ he muttered.
‘I’ll pop over and do your tea,’ I volunteered.
Seeing Mum a week later, I told her how much George missed her.
But instead of being concerned, she asked me if I was having an affair with him.
’W-what?’ I choked. ‘Don’t talk nonsense, he’s like my dad.’ I’d no idea where she’d got the idea from. Me and George were good mates. But the thought of going after Mum’s cast offs… yuck!
Still, George was heading to South Africa for a month to see his daughter Linda.
Hopefully, with George being out of the country, that would ease Mum’s mind about me and him.
Sitting on the bus by myself, heading to the supermarket two weeks later, I couldn’t help laughing at Mum’s accusation. I mean, George was a nice bloke, but I’d never feel more for him than a mate…
Actually, it was quite nice to find myself smiling. It seemed since George had gone, I was feeling really down.
‘It must just be because I’m doing the shopping by bus,’ I muttered aloud.
As the days dragged on without George for company, I felt lower and lower. It wasn’t just having someone to chat about bargain offers to, either.
No, I missed George. His kindness, his lovely genuine eyes, his laugh…
Oh God! I wasn’t… falling for him, was I? Maybe Mum’s imagination hadn’t been as overactive as I’d thought. Maybe she’d noticed something even before I had.
Trouble was, I didn’t see George as a man in his 50s. He made me laugh, took care of me, made everything right…
‘Snap out of it,’ I told myself, ‘He’s your mum’s ex.’ My stomach lurched at the thought of how hurt she’d be if she knew her suspicions were right.
Didn’t stop me thinking about him, though. Blokes my age were all the same – just looking for a bit of slap and tickle.
The day he flew home, I bought him some food, then popped around.
‘You’re so kind,’ he said, hugging me. ‘I missed you.’
After tea, he looked nervous and took my hand gently.
‘While I was away…erm…I really missed you,’ he stammered.
‘I missed you, too,’ I smiled.
‘I mean, really missed you,’ he looked into my eyes. ‘If you want me, I’m yours.’
I nearly fell off my chair.
This is wrong! my mind was screaming. He’s too old, he’s your mum’s ex…
But my heart was thudding in my chest – he loved me and I loved him!
I’d been lonely for so long. I didn’t want to hurt Mum, but didn’t I deserve happiness?
‘I feel the same,’ I agreed.
As George kissed me, my legs went to putty.
It was crazy, but I didn’t want to be apart from him again.
George rang Mum, and I braced myself for the fall-out.
‘I just knew you two were having an affair,’ she gasped.
I understood why she’d think that, but it wasn’t true – and she wouldn’t believe us, no matter what we said.
I’d found my heart’s desire, and shattered my mum’s in the process.
How can you be so happy that you’re floating on cloud nine, but at the same time be so miserable because you’ve hurt a loved one? Sometimes it felt like I was being torn in two, one person couldn’t possibly contain such strong emotions all at once.
Yet no amount of guilt and
misery could cancel out the love between George and me. Somehow, despite everything, we laughed, talked, and built a brilliant relationship.
Two years on, I’ve never been happier – I feel awful for saying that because I’ve hurt Mum, but it’s true.
George and me are taking things slowly for the kids’ sake, but he’s the one for me.
And despite everything, me and Mum are working on rebuilding our relationship.
I just hope one day, we can be a happy family again.

George Coleburne, 59, says:
‘When me and Sylvia split, I realised I was in love with Katrina. I know it’s difficult for her mother, but we’ve done nothing wrong other than fall in love.’

Sylvia McKenzie, 55 says:
‘I feel betrayed and all the family think it’s disgusting. I’m trying to move on with my life.’

Katrina Williams, 39, Chadderton, Manchester